Wednesday, May 3, 2017

prom, ducky, and rethinking it all


Sierra attended her junior prom with Parker two weeks ago.  She and Parker have been bff's since forever.  Sometimes I think those are the best kind of dates.

Last week, in honor of the whole prom thing, I decided to watch one of my favorite 80's movies, Pretty in Pink. I think it's arguably the most iconic prom film of the era.  Molly Ringwald was at her best with the whole lip pout thing, and the soundtrack... If you Leave...who didn't have a couple of "cry it outs" to that one?  So, I still love this movie 20+ years later, but I especially loved watching it in my current circumstances, as my current self, and with the life experience I've gained.  I reflected how my sixteen year old self  was completely in love with Andrew McCarty (Blain) and how I wanted that happy ending for he and Andie (Molly Ringwald).  So, 20+ years later, and after more "life experience " then I could have ever imagined, I have to say, I would have chosen Ducky.  Ducky (Jon Cryer) plays Andie's bff in the movie.   Ducky was as true and loyal as they come.  And more than anything, Ducky knew how to make Andie laugh.

  And, If I may borrow a line from Jane Austen, 
I dearly love to laugh. 





Monday, April 17, 2017

I miss.

Hello my little blog,
     I miss you.  I miss normalcy.  I miss a routine that conserved my mental energy and let me coast on auto pilot.   I miss all that was good about my old life.  I miss connections that I've lost.  I miss what I thought my future would hold.  I miss my favorite songs that have now taken on different meanings.  I miss emotional security even in it's completely convoluted form.  I miss my kids having that too. I miss the me that mostly saw the world through rose colored glasses.  I miss waking up in the morning with nothing more than the mundane task of laundry on my mind.  I miss what could have been.  I miss breathing without having to think about breathing.


And sometimes, I miss the old me.  

But mostly, I am so grateful for the new me.  The me that knows how to do hard again, and again, and again.  The me that refuses to give up or back down.  The me that is stronger and better and filled with hope.  The me who understands, on an even deeper level, that I am a trusted and worthy daughter of God. The me that has so much to do and feels so much light ahead .  

Beautiful, happy, healing, joyful
l i g h t.

Wednesday, March 22, 2017

MORP 2017

MORP dance..."Let's glow crazy" with a white out for the neon dance lights.  


And In and Out burger. The best kind of casual.


Sierra and her date, Docker.



Glow Baby, Glow. 


Sunday, March 5, 2017

drewby and the deep south

This Tuesday will mark the sixth month of Drew's mission. It's gone by really fast for the most part. I just know he's exactly where he's suppose to be, and that gets me through most of the intense, missing him moments. The first part of Drew's mission he was stationed in Greenville, Mississippi.  It was a very rough area at times, lots of poverty, and things Drew had never before encountered.  But as he adjusted to his new environment, he also developed a deep love of the people in Greenville.  He also had an opportunity to become very close to some of the families he worked with, like the Coles.

Catching up with some other Elders at a zone conference in Jackson.

Bullet  holes in the sister missionaries car (I don't know why Drew is smiling?!)




Drew's good friend from high school, Elder Webster,  is also serving in the Jackson, Mississippi  mission.

Two weeks ago Drew was transferred to Monroe, Louisiana.  Aka...the home of Duck Dynasty.  Drew's greatest aspiration is to meet the clan and be asked to say the prayer at dinner in the closing scene of one of their episodes (Phil are you out there??)
 Drew has always known how to make people laugh.  His incredibly even temperament combined with his kind heart and quick (and slightly quirky) wit just seems to draw people to him.  Anyway, I will just end this post with a little excerpt from Drew's last email. It's just so Drew.


I was just chilling by the door waiting for elder adams to lock his bike up when all the sudden this old dude comes up behind me and starts yelling at me to repent or be damned! I was like what the heck!? He starts telling me how im full of sin and the mormom church was founded on lust and all this hahahahhahahaha i was blown away! Like dang man have some respect! He was just preaching to us at the top of his lungs like you see guys do on movies or something and making a big scene and i was just laughing . I did defend the church though and did my best to counter everything he said. We went on for like 10 min and people kept watching us and just laughing at this dude haha. I dont know how many times he told us we were damned though! I love the south! So anyway I am in a car share with sisters now so we bike quite a bit. So yesterday we were biking down to some investigators house. There are no sidewalks or bikelanes in the south so you just kinda ride on the edge of the road lol. Anyway we are cruising and all the sudden i get nailed by a taco right on the back! Someone decided to waste a perfectly good taco and do a drive by taco toss on me! It really sucked lolol! Especially all that taco juice on the white shirt, not a good combo lemme tell ya. Anyways thats about it for this week haha. I am loving my mission and all the things that come with it! Deuces yall have a good one!

How I miss that kid.  Happy Sunday.

Monday, February 13, 2017

namaste

I went running today for the first time in forever. It made my heart so happy.  It's a perfect Arizona winter day, a few lazy clouds hanging around, sunshine breaking through, and 70 degrees.  The best kind of day to run.  I know me.  Very well.  I have never been able to heal my mind or my spirit without healing my body.  They are so intricately connected.   Last February I created my first vision board (more about that to come). On one of the cards I wrote,  "I will become a certified yoga instructor and have the opportunity to teach".  I wasn't even sure why I wrote this.  I have mostly been doing Pilates for the last several years. But then, after my women's retreat in November,  this goal became something I knew I needed to pursue.

So here goes my next adventure.
Graduating in June.

Namaste, my beautiful readers.

Sunday, January 1, 2017

surprise yourself

Take a pen and write this down
Draw something that can't be found
And learn to walk again somehow
You know you might surprise yourself
Love her if you only knew
The times that train has fooled me too
And tears me from a place I know
It helps me to surprise myself
You know you can surprise yourself
So let go and surprise yourself
(jack garratt-surprise yourself)


me.
my mantra.
my new life.
welcome 2017