Thursday, February 7, 2013

you can call me "honey" (or not)

Have you ever noticed how some people (especially strangers) can get away with calling you " sweetie, honey, dear, etc.." and some cannot.  I had my yearly  ob/gyn checkup today (necessary evil).  After the nurse left, she sent in a very young female medical student who greeted me with a chipper (and to her credit well meaning) ,  "Hi Miss Terra, how are you doing today?".  "Miss Terra?!" Nope.  She couldn't pull it off without me feeling slightly annoyed.    And it's not always a function of the deliver's age.  The next person to come into the room was Talia,  my doctor's PA who greeted me with, "Hello dear, how are you?"  No brisling on my part what so ever, and even a thought of, "I love Talia, she always makes these little visits bearable."  Although Talia is younger than me, she is one of the most knowledgeable, well spoken gals I've ever met.  We have a repoire,  and she can get away with calling me "dear".   There are also other people who gracefully and endearingly can refer to me using the afore-mentioned words....My mom, my mother-in-law, my tennis coach, the receptionist at my kids ortho and  sometimes,  strangers, depending on the context and my mood.  But what about the teenager wearing braces checking me out at Ross who asks, "Is that all sweetie?"  Nope.  The high school student at the Wendy's drive-thru who asks, "Do you want ketchup, hon?" Nope. There's something about those terms that lends and air of authority coupled with affection.  And for some reason, I've developed a subconscious "code of conduct" in my mind that automatically sorts people's comments into, the "nope" or "awe...that was nice" catagories.  I, myself,  use the terms sparingly and usually jokingly if it's anyone besides my kids.  Like when I'm laughing because a friend is telling me about something ridiculous she did and I say, "Oh sweetie, what were you thinking?!" Or when Gregg needs me to do something I'd rather not, like get the oil changed in our car, and I respond, "Yes, dear".  I think using terms of affection is a lovely thing.....when thoughtfully placed. And that, dear readers, is something I hope you'll allow me from time to time.  It is the month to celebrate love, after all.

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